Give her the ability to sleep soundly in her berth while on the hook, especially when we are on vacation, and her father and I have had a couple of drinks after she’s gone to bed.
Grant her an appreciation for birthday parties swimming in a quiet cove with her girlfriends, as I am pretty positive that my husband meant it when he said “I am never setting foot in a Chuck E. Cheese ever again. You can do that $#%* as a single parent.”
And if she ever does think of complaining about the weekends spent on the water with her family, let her be reminded of her father’s hour-long commute each way so that she can live near the water, and the fact that her mother hasn’t eaten brunch in years because we’re so committed to our weekends on the boat. Let her soul be filled with gratitude and thanks for her parents, and accept the fact that she’s going to attend public school for the rest of her life so that we can afford this.
Lord, at school, let her fall into a crowd of other children who enjoy being out on the water. And let those children come from families who value boat ownership, so that we don’t always end up being the party boat of 80 screaming kids high on juice boxes.
And of those adorable children, Lord, let one of them have a parent who is a talented yacht broker willing to help us find a bigger boat for less than the standard 4% commission.
Lord, spare my daughter from the desire to get a tattoo of an anchor anywhere on her body. Let not a dolphin grace her lower back nor a sunrise sully her alabaster shoulders. Let her think excessive piercings are “grody,” and instead be content with making jewelry out of the sea glass she finds on the shores of our idyllic family vacations.
But Lord, let not that sea glass infatuation go too far. Let her creative heart understand moderation and recognize tackiness when she sees it. And let her not demand that I wear it in public.
One day, let her fall in love with a man who shares her passion with her. May they spend long weekends on the Bay and visit exciting anchorages together. Let her have a love that is as wide as the horizon and as deep as the ocean.
But Lord, place not a sailor in my daughter’s heart.
And also preferably not someone who lives on a ridiculous boat he says he “inherited” but everyone suspects he pulled out of the mud because he’s so cheap. Grant her future husband the serenity of a home that does not float so that her parents may easily come and visit without the situation getting weird.
Oh, and Lord, let her future husband be not one of those “Deadliest Catch” guys. Let her know the pungent smell of fish guts as a temporary thing; not an everyday thing.
And most importantly, Lord, let her understand that her parents love her more than life itself. We want to give her the best life possible, and the only way we know to do that is to have seawater spraying in her face. May she one day look back on her life and see that when we forced her to use a head, pump the bilge, and scrub the decks, what we were truly saying is that we love her.
Amen.
Tuesday, December 24, 2013 - 09:45
On Christmas Eve, we are thankful for so many wonderful people in our lives. For our senior editor Duffy Perkins, there's one person in particular. From the December issue of PropTalk.
Lord, let her life jacket be comfortable. Let her neither scream nor hit whenever her father or I attempt to fasten it to her tiny yet exceptionally strong body. Let her make peace with safety.
And let her not be stricken by sea sickness. Deliver her from the wrath that is barfing over the side, although possibly let her do it once so that she finds in her heart compassion for those who do regularly suffer from it, and not place judgment upon them for being weak. 
Give her the ability to sleep soundly in her berth while on the hook, especially when we are on vacation, and her father and I have had a couple of drinks after she’s gone to bed.
Grant her an appreciation for birthday parties swimming in a quiet cove with her girlfriends, as I am pretty positive that my husband meant it when he said “I am never setting foot in a Chuck E. Cheese ever again. You can do that $#%* as a single parent.”
And if she ever does think of complaining about the weekends spent on the water with her family, let her be reminded of her father’s hour-long commute each way so that she can live near the water, and the fact that her mother hasn’t eaten brunch in years because we’re so committed to our weekends on the boat. Let her soul be filled with gratitude and thanks for her parents, and accept the fact that she’s going to attend public school for the rest of her life so that we can afford this.
Lord, at school, let her fall into a crowd of other children who enjoy being out on the water. And let those children come from families who value boat ownership, so that we don’t always end up being the party boat of 80 screaming kids high on juice boxes.
And of those adorable children, Lord, let one of them have a parent who is a talented yacht broker willing to help us find a bigger boat for less than the standard 4% commission.
Lord, spare my daughter from the desire to get a tattoo of an anchor anywhere on her body. Let not a dolphin grace her lower back nor a sunrise sully her alabaster shoulders. Let her think excessive piercings are “grody,” and instead be content with making jewelry out of the sea glass she finds on the shores of our idyllic family vacations.
But Lord, let not that sea glass infatuation go too far. Let her creative heart understand moderation and recognize tackiness when she sees it. And let her not demand that I wear it in public.
One day, let her fall in love with a man who shares her passion with her. May they spend long weekends on the Bay and visit exciting anchorages together. Let her have a love that is as wide as the horizon and as deep as the ocean.
But Lord, place not a sailor in my daughter’s heart.
And also preferably not someone who lives on a ridiculous boat he says he “inherited” but everyone suspects he pulled out of the mud because he’s so cheap. Grant her future husband the serenity of a home that does not float so that her parents may easily come and visit without the situation getting weird.
Oh, and Lord, let her future husband be not one of those “Deadliest Catch” guys. Let her know the pungent smell of fish guts as a temporary thing; not an everyday thing.
And most importantly, Lord, let her understand that her parents love her more than life itself. We want to give her the best life possible, and the only way we know to do that is to have seawater spraying in her face. May she one day look back on her life and see that when we forced her to use a head, pump the bilge, and scrub the decks, what we were truly saying is that we love her.
Amen.
Give her the ability to sleep soundly in her berth while on the hook, especially when we are on vacation, and her father and I have had a couple of drinks after she’s gone to bed.
Grant her an appreciation for birthday parties swimming in a quiet cove with her girlfriends, as I am pretty positive that my husband meant it when he said “I am never setting foot in a Chuck E. Cheese ever again. You can do that $#%* as a single parent.”
And if she ever does think of complaining about the weekends spent on the water with her family, let her be reminded of her father’s hour-long commute each way so that she can live near the water, and the fact that her mother hasn’t eaten brunch in years because we’re so committed to our weekends on the boat. Let her soul be filled with gratitude and thanks for her parents, and accept the fact that she’s going to attend public school for the rest of her life so that we can afford this.
Lord, at school, let her fall into a crowd of other children who enjoy being out on the water. And let those children come from families who value boat ownership, so that we don’t always end up being the party boat of 80 screaming kids high on juice boxes.
And of those adorable children, Lord, let one of them have a parent who is a talented yacht broker willing to help us find a bigger boat for less than the standard 4% commission.
Lord, spare my daughter from the desire to get a tattoo of an anchor anywhere on her body. Let not a dolphin grace her lower back nor a sunrise sully her alabaster shoulders. Let her think excessive piercings are “grody,” and instead be content with making jewelry out of the sea glass she finds on the shores of our idyllic family vacations.
But Lord, let not that sea glass infatuation go too far. Let her creative heart understand moderation and recognize tackiness when she sees it. And let her not demand that I wear it in public.
One day, let her fall in love with a man who shares her passion with her. May they spend long weekends on the Bay and visit exciting anchorages together. Let her have a love that is as wide as the horizon and as deep as the ocean.
But Lord, place not a sailor in my daughter’s heart.
And also preferably not someone who lives on a ridiculous boat he says he “inherited” but everyone suspects he pulled out of the mud because he’s so cheap. Grant her future husband the serenity of a home that does not float so that her parents may easily come and visit without the situation getting weird.
Oh, and Lord, let her future husband be not one of those “Deadliest Catch” guys. Let her know the pungent smell of fish guts as a temporary thing; not an everyday thing.
And most importantly, Lord, let her understand that her parents love her more than life itself. We want to give her the best life possible, and the only way we know to do that is to have seawater spraying in her face. May she one day look back on her life and see that when we forced her to use a head, pump the bilge, and scrub the decks, what we were truly saying is that we love her.
Amen.